… on why blaze could not have had plastic surgery in europe
October 27, 2013
Late last night I heard some commotion at the side door.
Monty was up and woofing, so I came downstairs and, lo and behold, Blaze was back early from backpacking across Europe in search of a cure for her post puppy depression.
She looked great!
I told her that she looked very well rested and she held up a sign asking me if that was a round about way of asking her if she’d had plastic surgery, which sort of shocked me.
No, not that she held up the sign (duh, it’s Blaze) – the fact that she would think that I thought she’d had plastic surgery.
There are so many things implied right there and I don’t have time to go into it because I haven’t finished my third cup of coffee yet. But I’m sure you immediately thought – along with me – that plastic surgery would be difficult on a dog because, you know, there is so much fur and stuff. Right?
Plus Blaze’s face has a really intricate pattern on it with swirls and stuff, so it would be a little like an upholsterer lining up a very intricate Aubusson pattern on a renaissance period sofa.
I’m just kiddin’. I have no idea what that even means.
But for fun I typed ‘renaissance sofa’ into Google and found this:
So, ya. I guess matching patterns up on this sofa would totally be the equivalent of what a plastic surgeon giving Blaze a facelift would be confronted with.
So, in conclusion, Blaze didn’t have a facelift when she backpacked across Europe, therapeutically, to get over the post puppy depression she’d been suffering ever since Marshal Dillon Dingle joined the household exactly one year ago from this coming week.
But she does look great.
Welcome back, Blaze!
Thanks for readin’.
p.s., I just received word from Blaze’s agent that People and In Touch have both called for comments on whether Blaze has undergone plastic surgery (she has to deal with these parasites all the time) and they sent over these ‘before and after shots’. We have no comment on the matter.
Thanks for readin’.
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