… on what it takes for photographic excellence


Marshal Dillon Dingle… a little man of many talents.

Because I am a wicked professional photographer now, after taking my friend Jeff’s accelerated ‘How to be a Wicked Professional Photographer in, Like, 10 Easy Lessons” (Better known as Photography 101 with Jeff Anderson)…


Because I’ve gone pro, I’m now all about the artistic shot. Seriously. Okay, I’ll prove it. To be a Wicked Professional Photographer, you have to be really good right? And to be really good, you should evoke a mood with your photography.

Also, you should never say ‘with the pictures you take’ or ‘by taking pictures’, you have to say ‘through your images’ or ‘with your photography’. 

Which I totally did above. See? That is why I am now a Wicked Professional Photographer.

But, anyway, you must evoke a mood, which is like making people feel something. So here are some examples of me making you feel something. I will annotate them so that you can see what you are going to feel, so that you are not surprised.

1. You are going to feel awe. This is because I have managed to take a mundane thing and make it so amazing (we, in the business, call this ‘making the ordinary extraordinary’):


Flagpole thingie.

That was a flagpole thingie attached to the house in Maine. Sure, just an ordinary flagpole thingie. Attached. To a house. In Maine. But that’s not how you feel is it? No. You are probably like, ‘Oh my God that flagpole thingie is juxtaposed against the blue of the sky and – WAIT ARE THOSE TREES NAKED?!’ And now you are thinking that it must be late fall or maybe winter or maybe really early spring and that it is totally not summer and… whoa. Suddenly you are feeling exhausted.

So ‘exhausted’ is your mood.

And, since I have made you feel exhausted, I am therefore a Wicked Professional Photographer.

Okay, let’s try another one.

I will not tell you what to feel first (I think you are ready to try this one on your own).


A bird on the beach with rocks and stuff.

That is a bird on the beach with rocks and stuff. But wait! It is in black and white. So it is, by professional photographer definition (and I know this because I am… well, you are figuring it out because of all this proof, a Wicked Professional Photographer).

Where was I?

Oh ya. Black and white, in professional photographer speak, is moody.  

So, if you are feeling ‘moody’, you have probably recently seen a black and white photograph. And this is good to know because moody not only means, ‘given to unpredictable changes in mood, especially sudden bouts of gloominess or sullenness’, it also has synonyms including ‘temperamental’, ’emotional’, ‘volatile’….

Oh my Gawd, people. Do you think that all PMS type symptoms have nothing to do with craving chocolate so much that you get cranky? Do you think it could have everything to do with having just viewed a black and white photograph taken by a Wicked Professional Photographer?

This. Explains. So. Much.

Okay, one more.

This one needs some pre-info though.

Because the mood evoked by this one is ‘horror’, or maybe ‘terror’, or ‘thriller-ed’. So be ready.

Because sometimes a Wicked Professional Photographer gets photos that cannot be explained and leave you really thinking and contemplating the photograph.

Okay…. here we go.


Oh my Gawd I know.

It is a Super Mega Orb.

A SMOrb.

I don’t know much about spirts and such but that one is big and it is also red. My son, Sam, who took a class on film studies (where they studied film) told me that the color red in movies often represents evil type things.

So this is clearly something supernatural and it is evil.

Also, since it looks a little like a jellyfish, it might sting.

So the mood here is horror.

And, yes, this once again proves that I am a Wicked Professional Photographer.

Because the mood, that’s why.

So let’s go back to the photo at the top of this post (don’t worry about scrolling because I’m about to show it to you again).


That is Marshal Dillon Dingle, Wicked Professionally Photographed (by me… (I don’t want to brag but that’s true)).

What is he doing?

What mood does this Wicked Professional Photograph evoke (photo biz jargon) ?





Something German shepherd-y?

Sure, but that isn’t what I was going for.


Yes, confusion.


Because what is that blueish purple round thing (I wonder on your behalf)?

It is a jolly ball (I didn’t want you to wonder yourself into a tizzy).

Like, behind him right? (your question again)


Not behind him right.

It’s stuck.

On. His. Tooth.

That Jolly Ball is attached to Marshal Dillon Dingle’s head.

He couldn’t get it off, so he ran after Blaze – who was chasing her tennis ball all around the yard – for, like, TWENTY MINUTES.

The dang dog couldn’t figure out why he couldn’t pick up the tennis ball himself… as in, ‘Why will my mouth not close? What could be in my way?!’

“The dang Jolly Ball, that’s what!’ I thought, angry and full of emotion.

And look at that.

‘Full of emotion’.

My own photo evoked emotion in me.


I’m that good.

Thanks for readin’.


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